Bridget and Mary Jo - Rifftrax Features: Page 2

Page 2 Index:
The Scarlet Claw * Magnetic Monster * Inspector Mom * The Man Without a Body * The Careless Years * Try to Remember * Inspector Mom 2 * Blood on Her Hands * Crime of Passion * Sherlock Holmes and the House of Fear * Tormented * Rock, Rock, Rock! * The Spider Woman | She Gods of Shark Reef | The Woman Who Sinned | A Christmas Romance

The Scarlet Claw

Release date: March 24, 2023

While I've enjoyed the recent string of MHC movies, what joy to have B&MJP return to the world of Sherlock Holmes (after a 3-year break from them). This is one of the better flicks from the Rathbone - Bruce run, and one of the ghastliest (though not visually graphic) and sorrowful tales. 

But fear not, the ladies bring the spirit of laughter, noting, for example, that this Canadian based tale is populated with non-Canadian ventriloquists. There are also funny pop culture references, from Bridget's "Marshes, marshes, marshes", to Mary Jo responding to a scene by adding that it had, "Real irony, not the Alanis Morrisette kind". Funny as those are, I think the quip of the hour was the line... "Scenes of Holmes undressing and bathing Watson omitted out of sheer human decency!" which not only broke me up, but MJ as well.

The Magnetic Monster
Release date: April 5, 2023
"Is this movie basically a podcast?" - Mary Jo. Why yes, yes, it is. MM is a talky little piece, with no real physical monster and probably not much budget to show one anyway (the special effects footage at the end comes from the 1937 German film GOLD). It stars Richard Carlson of Tormented and Creature from the Black Lagoon fame, and the women seem happy to see him. There also a Maniac (Bridget just can't stop singing that song) and a refueling scene... so if you didn't enough of that in Starfighters, here you go.

Despite the dryness of the picture, it's not a hard watch or a bad riff, especially when the duo tosses in several hysterical observations, like when Bridg asks, "What's safer than an old mine?" Or MJ notices that "Thomas the tank engine has had too much Botox".

The biggest laugh I received came at the close, as all hell breaks loose, and we see magnetized objects flying through the air - which prompts Bridget to add... "Next, the janitor with the plate in his head will come zipping by." 🤣

Inspector Mom
Release date: June 16, 2023
It's Higgins Clark-lite and as irritating as the "of the bride series", but all that dumb n' irritating leads to a lot of laughs. Danica McKellar stars, and of course there's a Wonder Years quip, but even funnier was when they reference "Small Wonder". 

So yeah, they twist the dialogue (a knee injury preventing a couple from having a child) and tease the music ("if Danny Elfman had composed the Law-and-Order sting.") and come up with funny nicknames (Dollar Tree Patrick Swayze) - all their classic moves, and as funny as hell.

The Man Without a Body
Release date: July 14, 2023

"Pay no attention to the agonizing monkey screams you're about to hear" - MJ

I agree with Mary Jo that this one of the stupidest movies ever made... the plan to use Nostradamus's brain to save a man's life makes little sense, it does however, make for funny riff material. While I wouldn't call this an upper-level release, there are good laughs throughout, and once the head shows up the absurdity of that, the visuals, kick things up a notch - and the final act? Yeah, sometimes all you can do is giggle ("He looks like he's going to be in a play about tooth decay" - Bridget).

Quips about MyChart and a nod to MLBs new pitch clock - the monkey head scene, a not-very subtle metaphor, and of course, a couple of nods to Jan in the Pan are among the highlights. Oh, and Jason Martian's poster art is a winner.

The Careless Years
Release date: August 4, 2023

Arthur Hiller (Love Story) directs, Dean Stockwell broods, and Barbara Billingsley frets over her hormonal teenage daughter. Smells like teen angst and boy does it drag - (the ladies don't let it off the hook for that, "The Shackleton expedition didn't take this long", says MJ). All this squishiness invites some bawdy riffs (teen girl - "I feel the same as you do" / Bridget - "Blue balled?") I really enjoyed it and the references and call backs ("Gentle pressure") - steamy dressing room scenes and punchy dads help too. (BTW, you might recognize Norman Ollestad from Ring of Terror, as a classmate (and note passer).

Try to Remember
Release date: October 20, 2023
"Oh, she just got laid off from the movie" - MJ
Boilerplate Higgins-Clark, that at times, just makes the ladies laugh at all the silliness (the revenge board's a hoot). Despite this being the duos 6th go at a MHC movie, there's still life in these tired tales (like the therapist, who's incredibly lax about patient confidentiality), and plenty to enjoy.... or be irritated by (the constant 'drip, drip, drip' sound). 

Bridget and Mary Jo's riffing continues to be delightfully offbeat (a Civil War memory) full of funny references (Inspector Mom; that weird ginger, Carrie) and cute twists (making themselves the prime suspects in the killings). 

Alas, this is the end of the line, no more movies from Mary, no more B&MJ making mirth out of love and murder... well, at least not from this series. It was a hell of a run and loads of fun.

Inspector Mom 2
Release date: December 1, 2023

Maddie Monroe is back in Inspector Mom: Kidnapped in 10 Easy Steps. MJs early line about the shoes, followed by Bridget's, "a little something called implausibly", sums up the detective work and the screenwriting in a nutshell. The ladies draw humor out of that, and the mom stuff (the hilarious bit about 'macing children", and Bridget having Maddie abruptly end an important call from her boss by saying... "my kids are malfunctioning"). There's also a running gag about how the husband is named "Craig -slash- Terry".

This is also the first time I've ever heard the term, "bust a grumpy". I had to look it up and I'll just say, B&MJ are both educational, and gross -lol- BTW, according to IMDB, while they didn't film a third movie, there was a TV series, could Maddie make her return to Rifftrax in that form? Hope springs eternal.

Blood on Her Hands
Release date: January 12, 2024

Lady Mobster was one B&MJs personal favorites, so it's no surprise they'd have another go at Susan Lucci. In this flick, Susan plays a Femme Fatale, which puts the duo in a naughty mood, what with all her affairs and multiple husbands (a simple "Next" was one of the more amusing, and on point quips) - in addition there are musical impersonations, a slapstick cop, and a sex pass to laugh about. A silly good time was had, it made for perfect weekend viewing.

Crime of Passion
Release date: February 23, 2024

One of the best casts the women have riffed on, led by Barbara Stanwyck, who plays a manipulative ex reporter, trying to give her unambitious cop husband a career push. Directed by Gerd Oswald (Agent from H.A.R.M.) and It's a decent movie, but there's still much to play around with (see MJs droll observation, "Your most boring telephone conversation reenacted by Hollywood stars!") There's the time and era, the fashions and whatnot, and the anachronisms are a kick ("I love Dagon Ball Z" -and- "Truly amazeballs", lmao). Their personal lives enter the picture as well (Mike's Rifftrax speech to Bridget) - References are a blast (Dennis Haysbert, Godzilla, and Bridget's response to the line, "I have a little woman..." Jo March). So, there's a variety of cleverness - the only negative is that either me or the riffing lost a bit of steam down the end. A rewatch would clarify which, but for a first viewing, 2 out 3 winning acts aint bad.

Sherlock Holmes and the House of Fear
Release date: April 19, 2024

"Sherlock Holmes.... of Rifftrax fame" - Simpson/Bridget

Based on the story, "The Five Orange Pips" ("and still no Gladys Knight" - MJ) but retitled to the sensationalist "The House of Fear", though Mary Jo's suggestion "The House of Sassiness" is even better. Holmes and Watson tackle a mystery concerning the deaths of a group of friends, deaths that are signaled by envelopes filled with pips. The arrival of the morose maid tickles the ladies, chair needles made for some fun as did serving Simpson for dinner - all told, a decent visit with Holmes, though not the best of the series.

Tormented
Release date: June 7, 2024

"Um, someone needs a depilatory" - MJ

An MST fan favorite gets a re-do - As expected the beatnik boatnik makes for an easy target, the jazz takes its lumps, as does Sandy. But you also get some fresh new material - Bridget noting that Meg looks like "a mean cute bug" was a hoot (she kind of does), the Joni Mitchell and Ursula Andress quips brought a smile, and given that Sandy's real-life father was Bert I, the scene where she asks Tom, "suppose you loved somebody who did something bad", and Bridget adds, "Like make this movie.", made the joke even funnier.

Rock, Rock, Rock!

Release date: June 28, 2024

"This always happens when you and I go out for lunch, and I ask how Mike is doing". MJ's killer riff (said after a character breaks out in song) sets the stage for this mix of rock and big finance (if "The Big Short" were a 50s musical). 13-year-old Tuesday Weld stars (an actual teenager, playing a teen in a riffed movie, well that's novel), disc jockey Alan Freed adds a monotone drone to a number, while Bridg & MJ throw in their hilarious observations; sometimes admiring the talent, sometimes teasing it... "search for your note until you find it" - Bridget. Good tunes, good humor, another rockin' 'Trax.

The Spider Woman

Release date: August 2, 2024

"Scotland, sort of like suicide" - Bridget - Holmes is depressed and dizzy and through with crime, just as people in pajamas are killing themselves... or are they? Cute material here and there, though not a real laugh riot. My favorite scene was the visit from the creepy kid Larry, the ladies cracked me up during that one. 

Trivia: Gale Sondergaard (the villain) was the was the first recipient of the Academy Award for Best Supporting Actress (Anthony Adverse - 1936). It was also her film debut.

She Gods of Shark Reef

Release date: August 23, 2024

"I'm offended, but she's the one clutching his pearls" - Mary Jo 

Brothers on the run from the law wind up on an island of women. There's not a lot to this Corman flick, but the ladies are good at mocking what they're offered, "Well at least the dialogue is snappy" - Bridge - From the land of loud voices to old lady parkour - and pun hater MJ saying a pun!

I love the Jason Martian poster art, which includes a smiling B&MJ

The Woman Who Sinned

Release date: October 4, 2024

Erica Kane, Dean Wormer & Otter, and the guy who was killed by Ed-209, are among the stars in this convoluted cheating, murder, art heist, mystery. While the movie dragged, the ladies always have fun with Lucci and were in the zone here, with riffing that's quick witted and acerbic -- "You had an affair, why?" - "I always loved Brief Encounter" - Investigator - MJ.

Bridget's Daguerreotype's quip is another -of many- that earned a guffaw.

A Christmas Romance

Release date: December 13, 2024

Olivia Newton John stars as a single mother who falls for a cranky banker with a giant forehead. Riff-wise, John songs are a constant, and there's several movie references (one of the kids is named Emily Rose). Bridget complains about the excess of romance in the flick, and MJ notices a Norman Rockwell moment... and hey, a lamb!

The Orwell quote was a gem, but the biggest laugh came when a little girl says, "Good things happen too", and Bridget responds... "Except in Russian literature".

Page 1

The Mads Are Back: Part 2

The original was getting pretty stuffed, so I'm adding another page. Here's the first - The Mads Are Back: Part 1

Main Index

Index: Teenage Zombies | Phantom Planet | A Night of Shorts 12 | I Accuse My Parents | She Shoulda Said No | A Night of Shorts 13 | The Incredible Petrified World | The Creeping Terror | A Night of Shorts 14 | Mutiny In Outer Space | The Phantom from 10,000 Leagues | A Night of Shorts 15 | The Wizard of Mars | The Mantser | A Night of Shorts 16 |

Teenage Zombies - May 9, 2023

"We're doing something wrong!" - "Uh so are we, we picked this movie to riff" - Teenager/Frank

This is a smiler, rather than a howler, which is better than being a groaner. So yeah, mostly I smiled, at the references (Mitch and Murray, Sackler family reunion), at the goofy (a woman's drive through bar in her living room). 

Though I will say that it got funnier as it went, with Trace throwing in some clever quips (during a moment where characters stand and talk and talk and talk, "If Aaron Sorkin had written this we'd be a mile away" - and when the girls are put into a booth, "They're forcing them to become sports announcers"), it also lights up during the fight scene - plus Frank gets off a sweet closing riff that could be his new catch phrase, "Take that American society, you've been Conniffed!"

The movie, phew, what a chore, it really drags ("Yup, nothing more compelling than characters looking off screen" - Frank). There's a Batwoman reunion going on here, between director Jerry Warren and Katherine Victor, and MSTies will recognize Don Sullivan (Giant Gila Monster and Rebel Set), so it has that, at the least. 

Post show guest was comedian Irene Bremis.

Phantom Planet - June 13, 2023

While Chris talked about cutting bits from the flick, there are a few scenes not seen on the Sci-Fi era version (one of which led to Trace's, "Are those two women going to riff the movie now?") so that's something new for old MSTies. I like the first workover, but it's not so amazeballs that I was having flashbacks (other than the sledgehammer thing, where Crow let loose with a few notes from the Peter Gabriel song), plus this is Frank and Trace's first shot at the movie. 

The duo makes with the funny observations (the walls made of meat), draw from politics (forcing Mexico to pay for Raton's invisible wall) and sometimes, get personal (I got a big laugh out of Frank's narcissism line). The Tenet riff was cute, as was the complaint about the special effects overwhelming the movie. A couple of other goodies - from Frank, "What, are you Major Creeper, stop staring at me!" - from Trace, "Fred Gebhardt, Male Prostitute", but my absolute favorite moment was Frank's Twilight Zone reference, as this also acts a sweet callback to something he said on an episode of MST... "I'm the God, I'm the God!"

Good stuff - Special guest was cartoonist Bob Fingerman.

"Sometimes heavy equipment had to be bolted to skeletal frames" - Trace

A Night of Shorts 12 | Three Year Anniversary Show - July 11, 2023

The Mads 3-year anniversary opens with tributes from past guests, and then it's off to the prom with Mary Frann (of Newhart fame) - The Prom It's a Pleasure was one of two shorts featured in this show that were previously covered by Bridget and Mary Jo... and I have to say, theirs was a classic that can't be matched. However, I will give the guys the advantage on the other, American Look, which closes the Livestream, if only because B&MJ riffed a mere 6-minute cut of the piece, while Frank & Trace braved the entire 29! Among the laughs in these scenes, Trace does a gross (but funny) poop joke, while Frank notes, "They never should have turned Black Narcissus into a western" (this old film buff loved that line).

Sandwiched between those... The Nation at Your Fingertips, a dry flick about the history of the telephone (and yeesh, that early headset, pictured above, was a painful -though hilarious- looking contraption). Next, The Tip-Tops in Peppyland, which was pretty wacky, about as wacky as a short about milk can get. It was my favorite of the four.

The after show was devoted (primarily) to Elle Schneider, a DP and avid cinephile. I think she was one of the more interesting guests they've ever had. Since this episode was centered on shorts, she spoke of her work on a book and documentary about Centron films, which I loved, loved the questions she was asked, but I wish they hadn't cut into her time by adding other guests - I'm sure the trivia guy is nice and has a cool show, but I hated leaving Elle - and would have liked to have heard her speak on expanded topics that delved into her influences and the genre's she favored, etc. (even if that did go beyond the theme of the stream).

I Accuse My Parents - August 8, 2023

Weird, they actually got ahold of worse looking print. While the MST episode is a classic without peer, the flick was built for a riffing, and at the start, the Mads put their own stamp on the thing (mocking the cartoonish music was cute). Unfortunately, the second half sputters, and there are a few similar riffs that Frank(ly) aren't as funny (compare the line when Jimmy returns home after taking a beating). So, it's not something I'll return too, not with that other, about perfect version sitting on my shelves. But for a one timer, it was fine.

Comedian Myka Fox was the special guest.

She Shoulda Said No - September 19, 2023

Starring the woman who was arrested with Robert Mitchum on that famous drug bust, directed by the guy who helmed last months livestreamed movie, as well as Mad Monster and Radar Secret Service, and a dream match between riffer and movie, which provides the right amount of noirish cheese and unintended comedy (both dark and silly) as well as the intended humor launched by the twin titans. 

I love how they reference other (often better) pictures, "This is from the Sergei Eisenstein batch of weed" - Frank. And the observational quips had me in tears, like how smoking this stuff looks like playing harmonica, the line about the "theremin stick", and 'putting the bite' on someone; and how they played off the dialogue (Cop: "We'll throw the book at him" - Frank: "A Hunter Thompson book"). And to top it off, was the quote of the night... kid killer. 

This was top drawer Mads, just one hilarious riff after another - who needs the demon weed when you have comedy like this?

Fun Q&A too, with special guest Rachel Lichtman, from Programme 4.

A Night of Shorts 13 - October 10, 2023

More specifically, it's a night of Coronet. Most of these will be familiar to riff fans, though new to the Mads, and boy are they a blast. Here, the duo put a dark spin on an innocent time... where conformity ran supreme, and shaming the bad girl was the only way for theater kids to feel superior. From there we visit a naughty young married couple, spend time with hooligans and moral quandaries, and learn letter writing from overly enthusiastic teens (Trace cracked me up with the sticks of gum bit, and the quip, "she trapped that girl's soul in the paper"). 

After that, a new short to me, "Ways to Settle Disputes"... in the netherworld? This one served up some of my favorite jibes ("Wonder Woman is kicking Jonah Hex's ass" - Frank, and, "If IBS had a face" - Trace), funny, funny -though I have to dock them for whiffing on a Black Mirror riff after a Bandersnatch is brought up. The show closes with Goldilocks, a piece where the repetition drives Frank up the wall, and I think that (and the obvious animal abuse) makes this the least of the six. All the same, this was another fantastic show. 

Special guest was Dave Hill, it was a funny post show, they opened with riff talk and addressed the implausibility of bear housing. Books n' hockey n' Tenacious D were also discussed.

The Incredible Petrified World - November 14, 2023

Scientists use a diving bell to help break through the "phantom layer" under the sea, and then wander about in a cave for what feels like hours. There's not a lot to cling too, joke wise, on this dry hike - so I'm impressed they were able to do as well as they did with this one, even playing with the dull by having characters throw out random thoughts ("You know what Craig?" - "I like apples") that line got Frank laughing, and in turn, his screwy Popeye song during the credits cracked up Trace. 

Fortunately, we have John Carradine and Phyllis Coats ("Stay in your lane, Lois"), and later a weird old coot shows up ("from the Torgo school of acting"), but mostly it's about walking and resting and exposition and a montage, answered with puns and irritation and MST callbacks from the twin terrors.

Ken Plume was the Q&A guest.

The Creeping Terror - December 12, 2023

Selling this re-do as a special Christmas tradition loses something when you do re-dos through the year (this was the third). Not much to say, movies a chore and the riffing can't match the MST version - I had a chuckle here and cracked a smile there. The biggest laugh came when Frank threw in a musical theater reference that I wasn't familiar with, and had to look it up (Bobby).

Kliph Nesteroff returned as the Q&A guest.

A Night of Shorts 14 - January 9, 2024

It starts with a living gas droplet and closes with Coily, the spring sprite, these animated avatars of hilarity bookend the show nicely. In between there are a couple of familiar ones, a short about arranging a buffet table, and one about a Self-Conscious Guy (previously done by Rifftrax) and some newbies... "I Want to Be a Secretary", "Making Your Own Decisions" and from the folks who gave us "Making a Meal in 20 Minutes (as seen on season 13 of MST3K) is "How to Make a Sandwich".... the title alone is a hoot (are sandwiches that complicated)? 

I liked the secretary short and those characters (The bland guy behind the desk, and Robo-Typest) but the one about the young lady fussing over decisions was my favorite (Narrator: "what is a decision without action?" - Frank: "A Coleman Francis film") That shopkeeper cranking the awning was a hilarious way to end the piece. 

Special guest Steve Stoliar was there to discuss his book on Groucho Marx, which touches on his unlikely friendship with Alice Cooper

Mutiny in Outer Space - February 13, 2024

Special guest was Kim "Howard" Johnson who shared stories about his association with the Pythons - during this section Frank revealed that he got many laughs over Trace's improves during the show - but my favorite? Conniff's line about the crazy guy having a zoom call with clouds. Other than that - an astronaut forgets how to properly pleasure himself, Barbie is referenced, and Frank uses a term I wasn't familiar with, and wish to God I'd never looked up, LMAO.

They did get a bit overly enthusiastic with the editing with this one, which created a gap in the story. I know that's an odd complaint, we're here for the comedy after all, but I must have been getting into it because I was thinking, "But wait, what happened between this and that?" Bonus fun? A couple of familiar MST actors in the cast, including the Amazing Colossal Man himself (Glenn Langan).

The Phantom from 10,000 Leagues - March 12, 2024

The boys rattle off a litany of quips that gets the show started on a high note - A Place in the Sun is referenced, then Trace notes, "Hell of a place to fold his laundry", and later apologizes for a funny pun, cute. I'd seen this movie before and felt it was a good choice + as a bonus there are a lot of recognizable actors from various riff sources. I'm a little surprised they cut the shower scene; or didn't have more fun with Kent Taylor's amusing polka dot swim trunks, but overall, a cute one. And added bonus were Q&A guests, Bill Corbett, Kevin Murphy and Mike Nelson from Rifftrax.

A Night of Shorts 15 - April 9, 2024

Kids was the theme and kids were a dream. The show opens the most recent piece, 1970s Holidays Your Neighbors Celebrate, which opens with a calendar and sees Trace immediately jumping in with a pun ("He took that month off", lol) - the bit with the Greeks was a hoot too. After that, the oldest and longest of the group, Your Children and You (1946), an Irish classic... not really, but the Mads wring laughs out of that. Babies make good fuel for comedy, as this was the funniest of the 4.

Wrapping things up, Holiday from Rules? which was done on Rifftrax, but I think I found Frank and Traces take a little funnier, though neither group makes mention of how that one little girl had Joel Hodgson eyes (they also, strangely let "It stinks" go by without a call back quip). Safety After School puts kids in peril, and that's always fun, it was my second fave. 

Steve Darnall of OTR (Those Were the Days) and comics fame was the guest; and I think he was one of their best - he has a great voice, great personality, and shared some great stories. Also, Joe Flaherty, who recently passed away, was honored during the after show. Classy.

The Wizard of Mars - May 14, 2024

What a thrilling trailer, what a boring movie, and not even a good riff on Oz - there are no flying monkey's or cackling witches. Now, there is a dubbed Dorothy, who does nothing, and a kind of dull yellowish tile road, and John Carradine's floating head. Aside from John I spotted another familiar name in the credits, Tom Graeff (director of Teenagers from Outer Space), was the editor on this one, unfortunately he didn't cut enough out of this thing (even Dumb Industries judicious editing wasn't enough - then again, only trailer sized would have done the job, lol). There are several familiar shots, which prompts Trace to ask whether they can use jokes from the last time they saw this footage. So yeah, this was hard going, even with the Mads throwing out quips ("Oh Billy", HaHa! and, "Did Perry Como write this dialogue?" - Trace, which made me laugh as it made me think of the SCTV sketch).

After show guest was Julie Klausner, from the delightful "Difficult People".

The Manster - June 11, 2024

"Theremin pain can strike at any time" - Trace

A reporter's interview goes horribly wrong, as he soon becomes the subject of an experiment which turns him into a short tempered, two-headed drunk. A better title would have been "The Asster", because this character's a complete one, Frank goes after the jerk directly, while his partner goes at him in a roundabout way (like when Manster asks if anyone minds if has a drink and Trace responds... "Well, It's a bit out of character for you"). Beyond that, we get the political jabs, the dirty jokes, and where else in comedy can you hear Taylor Swift and Chaka referenced in the same show. The creature is both freaky, and extremely silly - which is good for a laugh, and the endless chase sequence sends Frank on a string of "Mannix's". Special guest was Bonnie Burton (Star Wars Insider).

A Night of Shorts 16 - July 9, 2024

It was a Centron-a-thon, with shorts that include the original The Quiet Place... 1953s "How Quiet Helps at School", shhh, read this quietly... after that (he says at a whisper) is "Boy and Girl of Britain" (1976) a cute travelogue hosted by a brother and sister team ("that is one moist boy" - Trace). The final 3 - City Pets (MJ & Bridget did this one as well - funny how each riff team offered their own Rear Window quip). The creepy puppet play about an angry puppet demon-witch-something, named "Rumpelstiltskin". And finally, "Understanding Your Ideals" (1950) which was one Rifftrax covered back in 2009. 

All of these were very funny - but the cherry a top the sundae was the meeting of the Mads at the end. Trace and Frank were joined by Felicity, Mary Jo, Bill and Kevin for a Q&A that was mostly centered on MST3K. There were a lot of fun memories shared, and the cast really do connect, effortlessly, so what a pleasure this was. The piece also opened with 4th anniversary messages from past guests.

The Mads Are Back - Index

In 2015 Trace Beaulieu and Frank Conniff reunited and hit the road under the title "The Mads Are Back!" (Though, to be clear, they do not appear in character). During the pandemic of 2020, unable to tour, they performed in a series of monthly Livestreams. And while you don't get the shared experience with a crowd of fans, you do get to enjoy some hearty laughs provided by this talented duo. Here's a look at the shows they put on.

Page 1 

Glen or Glenda | The Tingler | Walk The Dark Street | A Night of Shorts 1 | The Brain From Planet Arous | Santa Claus vs. the Devil | A Night of Shorts 2 | The Choppers | Phantom from Space | A Night of Shorts 3 | The T-Bird Gang | The Lost Missile | A Night of Shorts 4 | The Beach Girls and the Monster | The Brain Eaters | A Night of Shorts 5 | Voyage to the Planet of Prehistoric Women | Manos: The Hands of Fate | A Night of Shorts 6 | The Yesterday Machine | The Devil's Hand | A Night of Shorts 7 | The Brain That Wouldn't Die | Cosmos: War of the Planets | A Night of Shorts 8 | Battle of the Worlds | Bride of the Monster | A Night of Shorts 9 | The Devil Bat | Teenagers From Outer Space | A Night of Shorts 10 | Dimension 5 | Night of the Ghouls | A Night of Shorts 11

Page 2

Teenage Zombies | Phantom Planet | A Night of Shorts 12 | I Accuse My Parents | She Shoulda Said No | A Night of Shorts 13 | The Incredible Petrified World | The Creeping Terror | A Night of Shorts 14 | Mutiny in Outer Space | The Phantom from 10,000 Leagues | A Night of Shorts 15 | The Wizard of Mars | The Manster | A Night of Shorts 16 |

Darkstar: Terror At The Edge Of Time: The Watch Party

I remember the game being promoted and such, but this is my first time seeing the footage, and how sweet it is to watch with members of the cast - Trace, Frank, MJ, Beez and Josh. 

What we get here is not scripted riffing, more a commentary track... a darn hilarious commentary track that can be teasing, naughty (Josh's masturbation quip, which broke everyone up), self-depreciating ("The camera loves this guy" - Frank on himself), with a couple of running gags (MJ not getting a screen credit, faux TVs-Frank). They share memories and trivia, Beez in particular has good recall for such things.

The movie version presented here is in black and white, and made to look distressed. As the cast point out, the design work is pretty sharp. Though in this form a few roles were cut (Mary Jo as a person, not just a voice, as well as the actress who played Beez's sister. Though both are briefly seen in the extras).

Speaking of which - the purchase of the download also gets you access to bonus features. There's the movie sans commentary, behind the scenes material (which explains the mechanics of the game and includes sequences (in color) not seen in the film), a gag reel, pre-show spots and a post-show Q&A, where the team -with Chris- is joined by creator Jeff Allen Williams. Yes, they give him a hard time about MJs missing credit, but once we get past that, it too provides a lot of stories and much frivolity... though it saddened me to have it confirmed that Trace isn't speaking to Joel.

All told, the watch party was a blast, with content and laughs galore. I highly recommend it.

Home

Season 13 - Special Event 14

Special Event: Tom & Crow’s Unsupervised Year End Review Revue

Premiere Date: Friday, March 3, 2023, 5:00 PM PST

Mmm, the closing seasonal overview was short, and a pretty straight forward clip show with trailers and highlights sprinkled throughout - the biggest laugh was Kelsey's Crow talking about how everybody loved the new crew with not one complaint to be had, lmao. Magic Voice is ever present, Synthia pops in, as do Waverly and Growler. Not a lot of sizzle in the show, but good memories shared. 

To sum up: While I don't think 13 was their very best season (that honor still goes to 5 and 8), it was arguably the most fun. The event like feel of it all, the extra material (like Synthia Selects). Even bungles could turn into happy positives (white dot). 

13 featured many happy returns (Joel, Magic Voice, Penn, viewer mail) and wonderful new additions (Emily, Kelsey and Conor, Turkules and Dr. Kabahl, the strange financier from the future). There were memorable songs (Mothercrabber), sketches (Complimentary wrestlers, the Shape of Crimes to Come, Crow’s dead, during the Munchie Livestream), inventions (The Gilbert and Sulli-phone, The Duck Tape dispenser for Duct Tape) and special guests within the episode (Mrs. Kelly, The Skull, Friar Nolte) and out, during the after-show livestreams. 

There were growing pains for the Gizmoplex, and some things that didn't come together (watch parties), still, it was a hell of a ride - from the very first announcement, to the Kickstarter campaign, through the season itself. 

And that's a wrap. I haven't done this much work on the blog in ages and I'm a little pooped, so it's definitely time for go to bed. 

See you next year(?)

And because they are grand, let's close with Gizmoplex art for the human hosts.

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Season 13 - Special Event 13

Special Event: I Accuse My Parents Riff-A-Long + Short: Doing Things for Ourselves at School

Premiere Date: Friday, February 10, 2023, 5:00 PM PST

The final short of the year pairs Joel with Baron and Hampton - cool beans, I enjoyed hearing that vocal combo. "Doing Things" is another with backer written riffs, and while it's a slow stroll, it's steadier than the last fan-assisted piece. Rifftrax covered this one in 2019, but I like MST's version a little more. In particular, I got a kick out of the Wilson running gag, and Joel's, "Mr. Rogers makes it look so easy", as Steve struggles to remove his boots (Hodgson's shadowrama is also fun to keep an eye on; he's a true gesture professor). They both pull Peggy into their, uh, "riffery?" And both deliver the funny for the kid trying to open the paint jar (I'll give Trax the win here as I'm a Pixies fan), so there are goodies from both. 

Next, Yvonne, Tim (filling in for Connor), Kelsey, and Emily are introduced - Matt reads a letter from Joel, as Joel - then it's off we go to the tribute, which celebrates one of the all-time greats, I Accuse My Parents!

The cast sound in good spirits for the watch-a-long (the quacking painting tickled them) and there were some cute comments to be had (Jimmy having "resting gun face"). The chatter can be overwhelming in places (I tried to focus on EKT&Y, but sometimes the episode pulled me in), and they talk over the new sketches a bit, so I'll needed to watch it again without the crew. BTW, those host segs were... 

Pearl and Synthia with the set-up, Team Emily with the intro, where Crow confesses to being a street tough. Following that? Jonah's dating video with the bots helping out, Crow's take is primal, Tom (in 'stach) offers up something smoother and more romantic. Ideal family/art therapy is revisited, with Emily analyzing the bot's drawings (Tom updates his, while sticking with Hayley Mills and Gigantor). And finally, a love draft on the SOL (Crow keeps selecting antagonists, as he doesn't see the difference), thumbs up to Em for Batman & Catwoman. 

Aftershow Q&A? Conor writes in and asks if they ever accused their parents, and a fan asked who'd they'd accuse among the cast? Queries about hamburger sammiches and essays fill out the back matter.

I Accuse My Screengrabs

Fanart seen during the pre-show

Matt reads a letter from Joel

Pinky swear

Crow's ideal family (he's looking forward to the reunion)

February's lineup for Doomed Lovers Month

My rankings for season 13s shorts

The Fantastic 5

1. Cavalcade (Pearl & Dr. Erhardt)

2. Better Breakfasts USA! (Emily & Bots)

3. Court Case (Emily & Bots)

4. The Wonders of Reproduction (Emily & Bots)

5. Bicycle Visual Skills (Emily & Bots)

Rounding out 'The 10'

6. Lets Make a Meal in 20 Minutes (Jonah & Bots)

7. Bicycle Driver (Pearl, Synthia and Mega-Synthia)

8. Lets Keep Food Safe to Eat (Emily & Bots)

9. Mr. B Natural (Kinga & Max)

10. Balance Beam for Girls (Emily & Bots)

The Modest 3

11. Doing Things for Ourselves in School (Joel & Bots)

12. Pipeline to the Clouds (Jonah & Bots)

13. Sleep for Health (Joel & Bots)

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Synthia (and Pals) Selects 9: Doomed Lovers Month

The Girl in Lovers' Lane

Special Guest: Emily

Mega-Synthia reveals that she is a proponent of using nature's bottle opener (her teeth) and asks Emily why this is her favorite rom-com (it's actually "Never Been Kissed") and informs Mega that this is neither rom or com, which upsets M ("How dare you, no one checks my facts!"), plus murder and pool hall fights are her idea of a perfect first date. In the final segment, Mega concedes to Ems point that it wasn't so romantic, E says it needed more Drew Barrymore. 

First Segment Text:
Mega - "Not the sharpest tool on the moon"
Emily - "Puts the "antic" in romantic"
Mega - "Only allowed to have a sippy cup of tea"

GizmoBlip: The bots are mad at celestial bodies for meddling in the affairs of humans (after leaning the phrased, "Star crossed lovers" and taking it literally). Em attempts to correct them, but they rant on, even going after people with star in their name (Star Jones, Matthew Star)

Final Segment Text:
Mega - "Once totaled a car on Lovers Lane"

Emily - "Learning to thrive in unrelenting bleakness"

Mega - "Mug tree"

Hercules Unchained

Special Guest: Tom Servo (Conor)

Unchained, sure? But Tom has seen Hercules unplugged. Syn is concerned about the big cats and the harm they came too; Tom imagines a litterbox for a tiger. S then sings a song about Herc on a chain and being cold outside at night (as if he were a dog)

First Segment Text:
Syn - "It was much later allegator" 
Servo - "Hercules: Unchained Melody"
Syn - "Her best date nights are with the actual stone fruit"

GizmoBlip: Emily's all excited about this month of love, but Crow finds cupid's arrow terrifying - babies with arrows, how does it happen? Tom's not fond of baby gods 

Final Segment Text:
Syn - "Hercules: Snow Chains"

Servo - "A tiger of a different stripe"

Syn - "Has more funk than fun"

Girl in Gold Boots

Special Guest: Emily

Pearl has a new intro (she's going for 'friendly'?), refers to Em as the "Girl with brown hair" and asks her what it's like having no fashion sense. Emily defends herself but O Pearlo isn't interested. The second part continues this thread. 

First Segment Text:
Pearl - "The maroons have been encircled"
Emily - "Constantly profiled by the fashion police"
Pearl - "Once told Heidi Klum auf wiedersehen"

GizmoBlip: Hunks of the SOL calendar, which is filled with photos of non hunky things, like a ladder and the sun.

Final Segment Text:
Pearl - "Woman in green jacket"

Emily - "Human banana clip"

Pearl - "Doesn't joke about Zubas"

Tormented

Special Guest: GPC (Rebecca)

Mega-Syntha loves torment, and asks GPC about hers, which is more about being annoyed... by Crow. Mega shows no mercy when it comes to what she's do to the bot in GPCs place. Part 2 - M loves a revenge ghost, but gets irritated with GPCs lunchroom tales of woe (this time concerning Servo)

First Segment Text:
Mega - "She lost her coffee privileges" 
GPC - "Does this interview count?"
Mega - "R-E-S-P-E-C-Tea"

GizmoBlip: Tom and Crow practice kissing, by playing spin the bottle, only they've lost their bottle out the airlock. But it seems, once again, the jokes on Emily

Final Segment Text:
Mega - "Tom Servo killed me... with kindness"

GPC - "Just how big is the SOL cafeteria?"

Mega - "Tabling the table talk"

The Screaming Skull

Special Guest: Jonah

Why don't you have a crumbling mansion? Jonah blames the economy. The final bit sees Jonah still talking about the housing problem, which he caused by wasting his cash on brunch.

First Segment Text:
Syn - "Don't ask what she does with the fish"
Jonah - "A crumbling gothic MANsion"
Syn - "Sad and spooky is her beard and butter"

GizmoBlip: Jonah, Crow, GPC & Servo read the Misconnections section in Alternative Weekly... which are all SOL related. "Hello idiot", it's another prank.

Final Segment Text:
Syn - "Technically we're all screaming skulls"

Jonah - "Filling in the rest with terror"

Syn - "Has never been invited for brunch"

The Touch of Satan

Special Guest: Crow (Hampton)

Crow can't hear you, and it's all Pearl's fault (much to her delight). Her prank continues to the final segment.

First Segment Text:
Pearl - "All heat"
Crow - "Hear, hear?"
Pearl - "Aint she a stinker?"

GizmoBlip: The bots update Romeo and Juliet for a new generation, and because Jonah (their Romeo) is a method actor, they got him some real poison.

Final Segment Text:
Pearl - "Not today, Satan"

Crow - "Hear no evil"

Pearl - "No work and all play"

Screenshots

Index