Monday, August 25, 2014

802 - The Leech Woman

First Broadcast - 4 pm Saturday, Feb 6th 1997
#73 in Mighty jack's Top 100
Excellence Level: Gold
Movie Pain: High - Mean and depressing
Riffing: Only a few weeds among a bed of roses
Skits: Most are very good, solid humor

Lady returns from stock footage adventure all leathery and hell bent for death - and she's brought the secret to eternal youth with her:  Bleak and nasty, "Leech Woman" has got a bucket-full of angry, spiteful people in it. Everybody is using someone, in some way, and there's nary an honorable soul to be found. Humor-wise, this weeks effort was a major improvement over the last. The riffing is significantly stronger and deftly tackles a flick that shifts mood and focus characters three times during the course of its story.

The first part introduces us to our cast: which includes a callus Doctor (who studies old womanology), his mentally abused wife (and future leech), as well as a mysterious old lady who convinces the Dr. to make a trip to Africa so that he might discover how she's lived so long.

This trip makes up the second shift: Laden with poor stock footage, It inspires some great comments about the sets, scenery and costumes. -"Sigh... do you wanna light a fire under it lady", Crow has an impatient native grumble, "this tusk mask is killing me!"

The final shift brings us back to America, where our rejuvenated title character seduces a dim witted Lawyer (seen briefly in the first part of the movie) and kills for the sake of staying young. The sharp, biting quips are prevalent here as well -"She's leaving a slip stream of grandma pheromones" - Crow.

The Host Segments are okay. The bots trying to trick Mike into their pineal "death trap" and the Nanite strike had me laughing the most, while Pearl creating new laws was rather m'eh. And though I grew tired of listening to Servo yell for "JED!" - Leech Woman is Season 8's first step towards immortality.

Host Segments
Intro: Crow Vs. the prairie dogs. Segment 1: Crow's selective memory. The Apes get back to the good old days. Segment 2: The nanites are on strike. Segment 3: Tom helps Pearl write some new laws. Segment 4: the Bots are out to get Mike's pineal juices End:Servo keeps shouting "JEEEEDDDD!" and the Apes embrace their civilized side. Stinger: In a battle of wits, Neil loses to the Detective

Notable Riffs
"Lets see, Tattoos... Body Piercing..." - Crow as Old Malla
"If old women give him the creeps, maybe he shouldn't have gone into 'Old Womanology'?" - Mike
"So, those are my dreams of blood. Wild hu?" - Servo as Old Malla
"Hey look, she's got an original Ray Krock on the wall." - Crow
"He's got built-in smug." -Tom Servo.
"Now get your orthopedic shoes on, were going out for pudding." - Mike as the Dr.
"For a man, old age has rewards." - "Shiny purple shins." - Old Malla/Mike
"I love to go to bar. I usually order sandwich and have drink." - Mike
"Out of Africa." - "No no, there's more in the trunk." - Servo/Mike
"Real Africa, Hollywood Africa." - Crow
"You could bake a turkey in that dress." - Mike
"Gah, a woman made entirely of gravy skin." - Mike
"Yeah, fall "toward" the blast." - Servo
"I'll call you, I swear!" - Mike as David
"More roast stick, honey?" - Crow as David
"Sorry you were in the pound, honey." Crow as Neil (said to Susan)
"Hell hath no fury like me!" - Susan

Riff Explained
"The Earl Camembert tribe" - Servo
Another SCTV reference. Eugene Levy played the befuddled newscaster on the classic comedy show. Tom says this riff (and chuckles) because the natives hairstyles look just like Earls!

"Oh no, Alberta Hunter's going to do a striptease!" - Crow
Alberta's the great blues and jazz singer who performed well into her 80's

Stuff & Nonsense
* Old Malla is played by the mother of actor/comedian Sherman Hemsley (The Jeffersons)

* If you'd like to see Coleen Gray (our Lady Leech) in a couple of good films, check her out as Fen in the John Wayne classic, "Red River". She also does a nice job of acting in Stanley Kurbrick's "The Killing". Or for more B-Movie fun, there's always "Phantom Planet".

* Murray Alper -who went uncredited in the role of the drunk- can be seen in hundreds of bit parts on TV and film; including a Military Policeman in the MSTed "Lost Continent". From a cabbie in the Maltese Falcon to the judo instructor in Jerry Lewis' The Nutty Professor. From Butt Boy in Sgt. York to the Doorman in TVs Gomer Pyle; Alper did it all.

Available on DVD: Volume 28

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