Tuesday, August 26, 2014

811 - The Clonus Horror

First Broadcast - 4 pm Saturday, June 7th 1997
#70 in Mighty Jack's Top 100
Excellence Level: Gold
Movie Pain: Medium - 2nd half loses the fun factor
Riffing: Wildly Funny, very steady
Skits: Hilarious


Peter Graves makes his return to the MST universe one final glorious time. The focus of this film is Richard, a clone who starts to question the meaning of his life. His quest for the truth sets him on the trail of conspiracy and Keenan Wynn.

This is one of the best of the season; silly pokes at "Biography" and "Bewitched" -due to the appearance of a Darrin- run rampant throughout. But the real strength of this episode takes aim at the childlike clones with their vacant expressions and smoking groins.

An added bonus are the host segments. I've not been a big fan of the sketches through most of season 8 but the ones done here are really good; centering around a visit from super powered Space Children (Played by Paul, Mike and Bridget). The bit where the SOL crew entertain the tykes with a Mexican 'Sesame Street" like skit, is a riot.

Even the credits are funny, as they are used to tell a "Biography" style story. Excellent episode on all fronts.

Host Segments
Intro: Mike has a mustache and the bots offer their thoughts on it. Segment 1: Mike shaves. Pearl and the gang are visited by Space Children. M&TB try to get them to NOT send them a movie. Segment 2: Playing games with the Space Children. Segment 3: M&TBs attempts to entertain the kids backfires. Segment 4: The Space Children learn the facts of life. End: Crow gets a new nose and Tom sings a lullaby to the kids. Stinger: Guy sez, "Sure"


Notable Riffs
* "Crotch Fires And You." - Mike
* "Parts: the visible panty line horror." - Mike
* "Let's go film tampon commercials, everybody!" - Crow
* "Stop it; No heaving, thrusting, or splaying!" - Crow
* "HQ my hat looks like a muffin, over" - Crow
* "Malibu Barbie is down" - Servo
* "Have some sun my little friend" - Crow
* "It says, Please help me down from this tree" - Crow, reading note
* "Proceeding to #8 to read Pat the Bunny" - Mike as Guide
* "Honey we got mimes" - Mike as Keenan
* "Will you wipe me clone daddy?" - Crow as Richard
* "Ah, the director just points the camera at the lamp and trusts the lamp to carry the scene." - Servo
* "Boys and girls, today's film is called 'Virginity: Your Precious Gift.'" - Crow
* "Come on, let's put out our flaming crotches, and we'll go find your nose." - Mike
* "He fits right in with the dim-witted, overly-armed Southwest." - Mike
* "He's a nurse's aid who doesn't play by the rules" - Crow
* "Huge lamps of the seventies: tonight on Biography." - Mike
* "It's easy to get hurt." - "Like when I got my butt caught in the toaster." - Scott Baio guy/Crow
* "Let's see, what am I thinking? ... Uh, 'Duh,' that's right." - Mike
* "M-i-l-w-a-u-k-e-e appears to be some sort of nonsense spelling." - "Oh, it's Microsoft Spell Check By Phone." - Confessional/Mike
* "Our campus features a low gym coach to clone ratio" - Crow
* "This isn't from America, It comes from the river." - "I mean what! Were you cloned from a sack of doorknobs?" - Dick Sargent/Crow
* "Uh ... this scene was lit by an Indiglo watch, apparently." - Mike
* "Yuk it's turning him on!" - Servo as a clone counts backwards
* "I forgot my toothbrush for America" - Crow as clone
* "I'll leave you a lump of dough with hair on it to remind you of me" - Servo as Richard
* "There's a stirring in my little clonus" - Servo as Richard.


Riff Explained
"Larry Dallas IS the Saint!" - Crow
Larry was Jack's womanizing best friend, who lived upstairs in the series Three's Company. Richard looks a little like Larry. The Saint was a character in Leslie Charteris' mysteries about a gentleman adventurer who took from the evil and gave to the wronged. George Sanders & Roger Moore played the Saint in serials and TV. Val Kilmer portrayed him badly in a terrible movie that stripped Simon Templar (the Saint) of all his wit and charm.


Stuff and Nonsense
Many remember Tim Donnelly (Richard the Clone) as Fireman Chet Kelly on the TV show"Emergency". But for me he will always be -Stanley Stover: The crazy guy who thought he was the superhero, Crimson Crusader- in an episode of "Dragnet". My favorite line from that show came when officer Bill Gannon is questioning Stanley - "Your family name is 'Crusader' and your parents named you 'Crimson.' Is that what you're asking us to believe?"



Available on DVD: Volume 12


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