Wednesday, August 27, 2014

907 - Hobgoblins

First Broadcast - 5 pm Saturday, June 27th 1998
Excellence Level: Silver
Movie Pain: High - Idiotic pond scum
Riffing: Solid, good humor
Skits: Most are wildly funny



Mike has his hands full trying corral the mentally scarred Bots, who keep leaving the theater in tears. Ah yes, such is the suffering brought about by Hobgoblins.
     
Lowlights? For one, the film offers state of the art FX. Great care was taken by those intrepid movie magic czars; toiling day & night developing the "gremlin" like stuffed animals which strike terror... uh hmm - which spark mild waves of fear... No? Okay, they inspire derisive snickers. Anyway, these Hobgoblin dolls tap into your secret desires and cause all kinds of havoc.
     
Pathetically cheap and over-ripe with silly stabs at (failed) humor, 'Goblins is granted a top notch working over from the Crew of the SOL. This movie hurts and M&TB hurt it back with all the tenderness of a napalm enema! (Servo & Crow slam director Rick Sloane nicely during the end credits).

The skits are fun and Crow's documentary about Women is my all time favorite host segment - I howled when Crow's "special guest" wasn't sure if he'd sired any children with his wife. Added Bonus: Witness the greatest scenes of Rake Fighting ever put to celluloid.

Host Segments
Intro: Nobody means to turn anyone on. Segment 1: Pearl's couch takes a beating. Segment 2: Crow's documentary on women. Segment 3: Crow's movie crisis hot-line receives a disturbing call from Bobo. Segment 4: Mike and the bots leave some cardboard cutouts of themselves. It fools Pearl for a little bit. End: Servo travels though time to stop Rick Sloan. Plus, more fun with Pearl's couch. Stinger: The Hobgoblins take a golf cart out for a spin.


Notable Riffs
* "Full contact mulching." - Servo
* "In an unforeseen tragedy, the two actors were not in the car at the time of the crash." - Crow
* "Now, I'm going to remove your thatch." - Mike
* "Oh big man, you strangled a plush toy." - Mike
* "So, does Hardware Hank have a major defense contract?" - Crow
* "I don't need to see every part of the human anatomy outlined in spandex. I can trust it's all there." - Servo
* "What, is he going to get mauled by $100 bills?! Do something!" - Servo
* "I wonder if he knows his face looks like that." - Crow
* "These honor system banks are just never going to make it." - Crow
* "So did the ad for the job read, 'Wanted: Whiney half-wit coward?'" - Crow
* "Her pants have sapped her energy" - Crow
* "The cameraman just can't get up the enthusiasm to get over there." - Mike
* "He's really my mentor. He taught me how to truly love a woman; from across the street, through a telescope." - Mike
* "Oh, it just happened! Did you see that? The hose out-acted them." - Mike
* "I just wanna be brave for my horrible frigid non-supportive girlfriend!" - Mike
* "When threatened she gains the strength of a thousand trollops." - Servo
* "So we sent our armies to the Gulf war with garden shovels and grass rollers?" - Mike
* "Someone's rubbing puppets on us!!" - Crow
* "There's been an accident at the studio" - "We made "Hobgoblins"! - Security Guard/Crow
* "So, the result of his total immolation was minor redness and irritation?" - Crow

Riff Explained
"We stumbled onto Mel's Rockpile!" - Crow
"Mel's Rockpile" was an "American Bandstand" type program seen on the comedy show SCTV. It was hosted by Mel Slirrup, who was played by Eugene Levy.

"Let's go for a ride on the Clark O Matic" - Mike
A 'clark o matic' is an industrial sized floor buffer/polishing machine.

Stuff and Nonsense
The role of Fantazia was the first for actress Tamera Clatterbuck (AKA: Tami Bakke). Tamera went onto to star in several Soap Opera's and guested in shows like CSI and the X-Files. She also once dated Weird Al Yankovic.



Available on DVD: Collection Volume 8

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* Special thanks to siamesesin who wrote the "napalm enema" line. This was the winning entry in the "Hobgoblins" contest in which I asked entrant to write "painful" descriptive.