K00 - The Green Slime

Unaired Pilot - Filmed in October, 1988

And so it begins: At a small Minneapolis TV station, KTMA-23. Joel has been showing a clip of his ‘proof of concept’ at several cons in 2008 and explains that he’d had an idea for something called “You Are Here”, where he was the last man on Earth and was broadcasting a show with his pal, Rex the robot. He retooled this idea, drawing from the film “Silent Running”, to something closer to the MST3K we all know and love today. The proof of concept runs about 14 minutes and there weren't many riffs as the original concept was going to have Joel and Bots offer trivia and some light banter/jokes.

The bridge had a bluish-gray look back then. Servo wasn't around, instead there was a bot named Beeper who spoke in a series of squawks, beeps, and hums which only Crow fully understood. And Gypsy was a he, not a she. From the opening explanation, it seems that Joel was originally a being from another world that had built the bots and the satellite and was orbiting Earth. He says he isn't too fond of the President's shows (with the exception of "Big Valley").

Joel enters the theater alone for the first movie segment; Crow joins him for the second. Beeper is there for the 3rd, Gypsy sits in on the short 4th, and Joel’s alone again for the credits. 

Host Segments
Intro: Joel introduces himself, the SOL, and the film. He invites us into the Mystery Science Theater 3000 (“I’ll go around”, he says, “and you can go through”). Segment 2: Joel, Crow, and Beeper speak to the people of Earth (mention’s that he doesn't like President Regan’s TV shows). Joel introduces himself and offers us Earthling's a helpful invention called the Chiropractic Helmet (which will show up as the "Chiro-Gyro" in episode #105 "The Corpse Vanishes"). Segment 3: Joel introduces Gypsy and feeds him a biscuit. Joel also mentions that there are 25 other robots on the satellite. Joel tells Crow that he discovered the secret to life and it's on 8-Track. Segment 4: Joel shows us a sick Vacuum Flower (it spews foam), which makes Gypsy sick as well after he smells it. Segment 5: Joel uses a snake thermometer on Gypsy and Beeper catches the infection, as does Joel. End: Joel mentions the Spiral on Down and Crow spews foam!

Notable Riffs
In the first segment, Joel enters the theater says excuse me (to no one), and mentions that the film was made the same year as 2001: A Space Odyssey – The film at this point fades to black and returns. Tom’s Temple notes that in between this fade-out would be a scene where a character from the movie points out an asteroid and Joel quips... "That's no asteroid, that's a battle station!" which then leads to the film's title card. There’s no official word on whether these missing scenes and Joel’s line were in the original presentation, or whether this quip was added later for the sales tape seen on the “MST3K Scrapbook” (At DragonCon 08 Joel said that he’d found the Green Slime footage laying about and transferred them to DVD to show at the Con)

But… in a later segment, after a character says, “Take us around to the number 2 position” and Joel replies, “Speaking of the number 2 position” as he gets up to leave. At the DragonCon panel, Joel stated that this was the show's first riff. 

Stuff and Nonsense
The first doorway sequence was... 
#1 High School Locker
#2 Shipping Dock 
#3 Fuse Box 
#4 Regular House Door 
#5 Safe

The name of the show was drawn from Joel's stand-up act, where he mentions that his inventions were worked on in the "Mystery Science Lab 2000". The word "Theater" replaced lab and Jim Mallon suggested going with 3000.

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