Thursday, August 14, 2014

321 - Santa Claus Conquers the Martians

First Broadcast - 10 am Saturday, Dec 21 1991
Excellence Level: Silver
Movie Pain: High - Annoying kid flick
Riffing: Good not great
Skits: Most are hilarious

What a ridiculous film but saved by a decent msting "I sure hope that's Pudding" - Servo. The story? Guys in silly hats and tight green spandex kidnap Santa, hoping to bring joy to Mars' children. Look out for goofy stuff like, bad bear costumes, Mrs. Claus having a spaz attack during an interview and Dropo... that dear, sweet, head damaged martian. If Sid Melton and Mr. B Natural had a baby, he'd probably be a lot like Dropo.

There are several 'Hall of Fame' caliber riffs in this episode, but I found that it doesn't wear well on repeat viewings which is why it doesn't get the higher award. Never the less it's still a fun one, with a nice invention exchange (I love Gypsy's "Mr. Mash Potato Head" doll") and my all time favorite song, "Lets Have a Patrick Swayze Christmas".

Host Segments
Intro: What the bots want for Christmas. Invention: The Mads Wish Squisher turns good gifts into bad. J&TB's and the NEW island of misfit toys. Segment 1: Singing the "Patrick Swayze Christmas" song. Segment 2: Christmas movie remakes. Segment 3: Christmas essays are read. End: Gifts are exchanged. Stinger: Voldar laughs.

MST Hour Segments
Part 1: Frank's uniform is on display and our host admits to getting frustrated with gloomy folks during the Holidays. In seg 2 Jack mentions to having a bit too much to drink the night before and during the credits he plays Santa Claus and hands out money to the crew. Part 2: Perkins hold a Santa hat and offers his recap. Later, he provide some trivia and acts all jolly as credits roll.

Notable Riffs
* "Crush them! Destroy them!" - "You were adopted" - Voldar/Crow as Torg
"My finger isn't tired!" - "Look out nose" - Dropo/Crow
* "What is Christmas?" - "It's a Christian holiday ruined by commercialism?"- Martian/Joel
* "And no one on Earth will ever know that Santa was kidnapped by Martians!" - "Do you realize what you just said?" - Voldar/Joel
"And now, for your enjoyment, some suggestive scenes of jets refueling." - Servo.
* "Dear Hair Club for Men: I need help big-time" - Joel, as bald military guy
* "Gentlemen, We can't "all" be the Honey-Nut Cheerios honeybee!" - Crow as Kimar
* "I don't suppose there's any chance this guy's going to end up under the wheels of a train, is there?" - Servo on Dropo
"Oh my god, he's playing dress-up! NO! NO!" - Servo
"The doll has a teddy bear's head, and the teddy bear has a doll's head" - "Don't worry. We'll give them to dyslexic kids!" - Bomar/Joel, as Santa
* "We've landed. You'll just have to take my word for it." - Lomas/Servo (as Lomas)
* "What, no headbutt this morning? Honeymoon over?" - Crow
* "When she thinks of the mass media, she touches herself" - Servo
* "Why do you think they call him 'Dropo'?" - Crow
* "You know, elf tastes just like chicken" - Servo, as KID-TV reporter
* "Pills for breakfast? What are we? Judy Garland?" - Crow
* "Somewhere there's a warrant with his name on it. I'm sure of it." - Joel

Riffs Explained 
"I'm fine Dmitri, you're fine we're both fine, it's good to be fine" - Servo
Tom is referencing Peter Sellers great telephone bit from the movie, "Dr. Strangelove"

"His name is BF Skinner, he's gonna put you kids in a box" - Joel
BF Skinner was a behavioral psychologist who invented a device called a "Skinner Box", which he used in animal experiments.

Jump to the birth of his 2nd child, Deborah: Skinner creates a special crib called a "Baby Tender", which keeps her warm and safe. In 1945, "Ladies' Home Journal" prints an article about the crib, and includes a picture of Deborah in her "Baby Tender", with the headline "Baby in a Box". Folks who don't read the entire article get the (wrong) idea that Skinner is conducting weird experiments on his daughter. Controversy flares and urban legends are born.

Stuff & Nonsense
* Pia Zadora plays Gimar, one of the martian children. She won a Golden Globe later in life, which stirred up controversy as many felt the award was bought, not earned.

* Another award winner was Bill McCutcheon (Dropo) He took home Obies, Tonys, as well as 3 Emmy's for his role as Uncle Wally on the children's show "Sesame Street". Blll also portrayed Leo the Leprechaun on "The Howdy Doody Show"

Released as part of the "Essential's Collection" with Manos.

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