Monday, August 25, 2014

808 - The She Creature

First Broadcast - 4 pm Saturday, April 5th 1997
Excellence Level: Bronze
Movie Pain: High - Dull nothing of a film
Riffing: Chuckle-Fest
Skits: Wildly funny



"SLEEP!" - Hypnotist Dr Carlo Lombardi suffers from short mans disease. So, to improve his self-image he uses a girl to summon forth a well endowed sea creature from the past. The Monster kills and Lombardi gains fame. All the while he tangles with the unemotional Dr. Ted for the love of the woman, Andrea.

The riffing on this experiment isn't bad -but- well... the movie is just a lump of gray shadows, flat acting and long scenes of people standing on the beach.  Not really dull, in the funny way "Fire Maidens" was dull, or bad in the jaw dropping way "Manos" was bad. It can't provide "Bert I. Gordon" like cheese and there are not really any quirky characters to toy with (though watching Fuller's "Non" acting is fun). So what Mike and his robots have to work with is unmemorable at best.

Even the decent creature costume doesn't help because it has scant screen time. Maybe if Carlo Lombardi was replaced with Vince Lombardi and Fuller wore his "Brak" head. THEN  this movie might have been salvaged.

Joke-wise, there's a lot of name-dropping and slams on Fullers expressions. The SOL host segments are pretty solid. But the rest? Pearl is still not an enjoyable character for me. Unlike Clayton, who found a way to be a likable meanie, Pearl's just a regular old meanie. Her chemistry with Observer & Bobo will improve over the years, but at this early stage she wasn't much fun.

Of Note: During the opening segments, Crow and Mike do an exchange of "Hu?" – "Yeah’s". This is reference to a bit done by Second City comedy team, Burns and Schreiber. Avery Schreiber and Jerry Burns (who started out as George Carlin’s partner and replaced Don Knotts on the Andy Griffith Show) had their own variety show in 1973.

Host Segments
Intro: Tom and Crow get their "masters" mixed up. Segment 1: The Nanites help distract the Observers by blowing up their planet. Segment 2: Crow's "Tickle Me Carlo Lombardi" doll. Segment 3: Brain Guy grieves while Bobo and Pearl sing. Segment 4: Mike studies the "Fuller" method of "not" acting. End: M&TB ponder the "?", Pearl acts mean. Stinger: Bobo half dead on planet. But if chose one from the movie: Fuller's oblivious to the creature behind him (which soon, just loses interest and wanders away)


The "Tickle Me Carlo Lombardi Doll" was one of Beez's favorite creations 

Notable Riffs
"Maybe we can talk about it over a cup of coffee." - "Would you like a C-cup or a D-cup?" - Dr. Ted/Crow
"Is this felt? It is now!" - Servo
"So Mafia goons and withered spinsters party together?" - Servo
"Touchdown!" - Servo as The She Creature
"A creature out of time, the first life form of someone living today... over a thousand years old!" - "Strom Thurman?" - ???/Crow
"That's a million dollar idea..." - "Sell something for a million dollars." ???/Mike
"I'll give you one more chance to marry me." - "Look familiar, Mike?" - Drunk/Crow
"They tried to light this, but the movie is like a super-absorbent black hole" - Crow
"OOH, Lee Travino goes fishing" - Crow
"Top breeder, Bat Masterson" - Mike
"Sir Top 'em Hats evil brother" - Mike
"Your gonna hang for this King" - Crow (to King the dog)
"Eisenhower P.I." - Mike
"Samurai Lobster!" - Servo
"Death by Murphy bed" - Crow
"I am Elizabeth Weatherbee" - "My father is the Principal of Riverdale high" - Adrian/Mike
"It says, I'm a diabetic" - Mike
"Why do you hesitate?" - "Did you step in King poop?" - Carlo/Mike


Riff Explained
"Is this the Mr. Kite everyone always does stuff for the benefit of?" - Servo
Ahh I always like a Beatles riff. This refers to the John Lennon song, "Being For the Benefit of Mr. Kite", which can be heard on the "Sgt. Peppers" LP.

"I'm going to tell Hobie to stay away from the pier" - Mike
This references the show "Baywatch". Hobie is Mitch's (David Hasselhoff) son and there are a couple of episodes where the lad gets in trouble by the pier. One was titled "Pier Pressure" lol, and Mitch has to rescue Hobie who was surfing under the pier to impress a girl, the dope!

Stuff and Nonsense
* The role of Lombardi was originally going to be played by Peter Lorrie. Lorrie's agent had committed the actor to the role, but when Lorrie read the script he didn't want anything to do with it and fired his agent over the conflict. John Carradine was approached next and also rejected the role.

* This isn't the last time Dr. Ted Lance Fuller (Brak in "This Island Earth") will battle this creature. The costume, cast (Maria English, Tom Conway) and Director (Edward L. Cahn) reunited for the movie "Voodoo Woman".

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